SPERANZA - In a discovery that has sent shockwaves through the Speranza Ministry of Defense and caused at least three lead researchers to quit in frustration, new data suggests that the dreaded ARC Surveyor is not, in fact, a spionage system.

Using the same 4.2 million-credit decryption technology that revealed the Tick's Firmware, Lizzy’s team at the Labs has successfully decoded the "Beaming" sub-routine. The results are startling: the massive pillars of light emitted by Surveyors are not data-transfer lasers. They are high-wattage rave lights.

"We spent six years terrified that those beams were uploading our coordinates to the ARC Orbiter" a visibly sleep-deprived Lizzy told the Gazette. "It turns out the Surveyor doesn't even have a "Send Data" button. It only has one function: TEST_THE_AESTHETIC(). Those lasers are just the machine checking if the local rock formations have "The Right Vibes" for a 72-hour techno set."

Pictured a Surveyor. Researchers now believe the high-pitched whistling it emits is actually a corrupted file of a famous old-world song, "Sandstorm" by Darude.

The theory was confirmed following a series of successful raids on Surveyor Vaults. Previously thought to hold top-secret blueprints for planetary dominance, the vaults have recently been found to contain a suspicious concentration of:

• Industrial-strength glow stick blueprints.
• Heavy-duty speaker components.
• A localized "Smoke Machine" attachment for the ARC Harvester.

"The evidence is undeniable" Lizzy added. "They aren't preparing to conquer Earth. They’re preparing to host the loudest, party in the history of The Rust Belt. They don't even like the rest of the ARC. We found a leaked memo where a Surveyor called a Harvester a total buzzkill with no sense of rhythm."